If you use your voice to get attention, you use your eyes to hold attention. People tend to believe you, trust you, and listen to what you say if you are looking at them.

Direct eye contact is not just preferable; it is essential to effective private conversations and public addresses.

In most cultures, the act of looking someone directly in the eyes is a symbol of sincerity. Failure to meet another persons gaze when speaking implies disinterest, lack of confidence, insincerity or shiftiness. The same psychological associations are found in public speaking.

In one study, speakers who established eye contact were judged more truthful, honest, credible, friendly, and skillful than those who did not. Only by looking at your listeners as individuals can you convince them that you are sincere, that you are interested in them, and that you care whether or not they accept your message.

There are two basic ways to use eye contact to your advantage:

Look the Listener Straight In the Eyes

Looking someone straight in the eyes while you speak has a similar effect to that of shining your car headlights on a deer: he is transfixed; you have a captive audience so long as you maintain the beam. The eyes are the meaningful targets foreheads, lips, and chins are not good enough and the other persons eyes can tell the difference. Direct eye contact assures your listener that you are sincere, that you care about what you are saying. Direct eye contact enables communication to take place.

Let Your Eyes Talk for You

Your eyes are the best indicators of your emotions. If you talk about courage and perseverance while your eyes show fear and indecision, your listeners will probably stop listening, and will certainly stop believing you.